The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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