dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Just pee around me
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
