I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
