Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Non-Jews are for practice
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
