bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Someone signed my nipple.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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