Hey man sorry I got all grabby
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize