we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
