physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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