I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
