I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
