So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
