Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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