either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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