hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
