Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
