i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
