How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
