Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
how can u be prego again
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
