i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
