I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
