We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
