Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize