Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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