it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
it glows. i had to have it.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
