Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize