i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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