: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
