do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
