omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Sober January is a disaster.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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