Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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