Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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