I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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