I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize