i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Welp...herpes.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
