those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
