You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
