Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize