how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Randomize