So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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