Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
