youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Please don't give away my fajitas
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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