Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
My life is pants optional.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
