Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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