Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
