State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
