a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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