i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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