Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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