she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
