Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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