She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
