Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
